TNA iMPACT Report – October 7, 2010
We open the show with Abyss…um…holding Dixie Carter hostage. He’s handcuffed himself to he and is forcing her to walk through the backstage area with him and telling everyone to get out of his way. He’s got Janice and Bob over his shoulder, and she’s pleading with him to stop and leave her alone, but he keeps yelling at her to shut up and keep walking. Well, that’s…disturbing. They make their way out of the back and into the crowd and she continues screaming and trying to get away while he rants and raves about how he’s been saying that THEY are coming and on 10/10/10, THEY will take total control of TNA. He tells Dixie that she and the silver spoon in her mouth are gone. Abyss asks one last question before Sunday: does Dixie prefer Janice or Bob?
Eric Bischoff comes running out and tries to talk some sense into Abyss, but he holds everyone back with Janice. They have a tense staredown for several moments until Abyss finally unlocks the handcuffs and Dixie runs into the protective arms of D-Lo Brown and Simon Diamond, who spirit her away to safety. Bischoff says it’s over and motions to the camera to cut to commercial. Bischoff climbs in the ring and then…STING’S MUSIC HITS. Bischoff grabs a radio headset from a ringside attendant and starts to talk into it as Sting, Nash, and Pope make their way out of the back and we go to commercial.
Okay, we’re back and the Pope has the mic. He says that maybe it’s time Pope retracted his statement from last week, because last week, Pope looked the world in the eyes and told them that he is a no good son of a Bischoff. But maybe he’s not, because you can’t be a no good son of a Bischoff if he’s out here running a one trick pony show the way he is and playing the smoke and mirrors. Pope can tell him that all the black hat and white stuff will be revealed pretty soon, and on 10/10/10, at Bound For Glory, the walls are gonna come crashing down and the walls are gonna fall on Bischoff. Bischoff tells Pope that he respects the hell out of him, but he doesn’t know what he’s talking about, he doesn’t even have a clue. Pope says that they’re not 300 lions, they’re three calculating wolves, and Bischoff’s made it perfectly clear that this may be bigger than Pope, and Bischoff says it’s much bigger than him but Bischoff can’t help him because Pope doesn’t have a clue what’s going on. While Nash and Sting are leading Pope around like a dog, Pope’s just going in the wrong direction. Pope says he’s tired of talking to Bischoff and wants to know what it’s all about. Bischoff says it’s all about Sting and Hogan, and then Sting takes the mic and says Bischoff’s dead on that it’s all about he and Hogan. What started 10 years ago is going to come crashing down at Bound For Glory and he wants Hogan back in the ring. But it’s not about wrestling anymore, it’s about life, isn’t it Eric? It’s about two men who took different roads down different paths, but this is the end of the line, and he asks if Hogan is ready to put it all out there and put everything that he is and everything he’s about on the line? At Bound For Glory, when Hogan’s true character is revealed, will he be ready to walk away? Sting tells Bischoff to answer him now, and Bischoff says he has nothing to say to him. Jeff Jarrett and Samoa Joe come running out but Bischoff tells them not to do it because he’ll handle it.
If they want the answers, he’ll give them the answers. Bischoff says what Sting wants is something to fill the big black hole in his heart. Bischoff says they’re challenging a guy who is in intensive care as we speak, but that doesn’t matter because nothing’s going to fill the hole in their heart, and he’s going to show them proof: he points to the screen for shots of Hogan in the hospital. Bischoff asks them if they’re man enough to see video of Hogan in the hospital, and they’ve been believing their own BS for so long that they believe it, but there it is: eight surgeries since February of 2009. Bischoff says that if they want to kick his ass then have at it, because he really doesn’t give a damn. Crowd cheers big for that one. But if they want to fight, Jarrett and Joe will fight them, so he makes a handicap match for Bound For Glory with Jarrett and Joe against Nash, Sting, and Pope.
We go out back as the Mysterious Cameraman catches Mickie James getting out of a car and asks her what she’s doing here. She says that he’ll just have to wait and find out just like everyone else.
We see a video package hyping the TNA World Title match at Bound For Glory and the history of what led into the match.
We go to a video promo of Team 3D in Times Square in New York City, talking about how this was where Team 3D was born and bred, and at Bound For Glory, TNA will make the biggest announcements of their career, one that will change tag team wrestling forever.
Let’s go to the ring for our first match…
Winner Owns The Beautiful People Name: Madison Rayne & Tara vs Angelina Love & Velvet Sky
Madison and Tara break the Unspoken Code of Wrestling: they attacked the Beautiful People during their entrance before they got done posing. Kevin Dunn would have a heart attack if that happened in WWE. Rayne and Tara double team Angelina and hit a double Russian Legsweep and Tara covers for 2. Tara gets a chinlock and Angelina reverses to a small package, but Madison distracted the referee and he missed the pinfall. Angelina tags in Velvet and she hits a series of shots and a bulldog, but Madison kicks her in the back as she comes off the ropes and then Tara nails her from before and sends her to the floor. Miss Tessmacher comes out to take notes on the division she is now managing as Madison tosses Velvet back in where Tara chokes her out in the corner. Madison tags in and chokes Velvet as well, Velvet reverses a whip into the corner and Madison tries a leapfrog, but can’t quite make it over Velvet, who catches Madison and drops her on her face. Velvet makes the hot tag and Angelina comes in and cleans house on Madison and hits the Botox Injection, and Madison tags out to Tara, which then leads to Angelina pummeling her 2-on-1 and hitting a double martial arts kick, and Angelina covers Tara for the win.
Winners: Angelina Love & Velvet Sky
Madison and Tara start to argue after the match, but Miss Tessmacher grabs a mic and reminds them that all four of them are in the ring for the Knockouts Title, and it won’t be a tag match, it’ll be a four way for the Knockouts Title. She then reminds them that this isn’t a BFF club, it’s a competition, and to ensure that all four of those skanks (her words) play by her rules, she’s assigning a special referee: hey, it’s Mickie James! I don’t know what she looked like in Portugal, but she looks great to me! Crowd starts a big Mickie chant, and then Mickie says it’s sad that there’s no warm welcome for the newest Knockout, but everyone knew she’d make an Impact and would be Bound For Glory. It’ll be her honor to crown the Knockouts Champion, but as she raises their hand in victory, she has her eyes on one thing only because there’s one thing that Mickie James does, and that’s make history, and therefore it’ll be their pleasure when she wins the Knockouts Title and becomes the first woman to hold every title known to womankind, and that’s Epic!
We go to Mick Foley from a book signing in Massachusetts where he is just days away from wrestling Ric Flair in a Last Man Standing match, and he’s not taking anything for granted because if he beats Flair, Flair will kiss his ass on national television, and Foley plans on being the Last Man Standing. And that match is up…NEXT!
Backstage, Dixie Carter tells Eric Bischoff that she wants him to fire Abyss, and that he should have done this a long time ago. Bischoff wants time to solve this, and Dixie says no more time, she wants him to fire Abyss tonight and do it in the ring in front of everybody where he’ll be humiliated like he humiliated her tonight.
Back to the ring for feature bout #1…
Last Man Standing Match: Ric Flair vs Mick Foley
They tie up and Flair takes Foley to the corner and drills Foley in the Jaw and unloads with a series of chops and punches, then tears the tape off the cut on Foley’s head and punches him in the cut, opening him right back up and Foley’s bleeding already. Flair kicks Foley in the cajones and pitches him to the floor, then goes out after him and rams him headfirst into the guardrail a couple of times, but Foley mulekicks Flair in the groin and rolls him back in the ring, then grabs a barbed wire bat from under the ring. He heads back in and bashes Flair in the head with it twice, and then Flair flagrantly blades on camera and starts bleeding. Flair bails out to the floor and tries to head back to the broadcast table to get away from Foley, but Foley follows him and they start brawling by the announce table and then out to the stage. Foley takes the bat and grinds it into Flair’s forehead, but Flair goes to the eyes and tosses Foley off the stage and through a table. You know, Foley really doesn’t need to take bumps like that at this point in his life, in much the same way as we don’t need to take a commercial break. Unfortunately, that’s exactly what we do right now.
Okay, we’re back and in the ring, and as Flair drops an elbow on Foley for a 2 count, we go back to the commercial break when Flair beat Foley up with his own book and then kicked it out of the ring. Flair continues laying the beating on Foley in the corner and kicks him in the ribs, then goes out to the floor and grabs a bag from under the ring. He pours it out inside the ring and wouldn’t you know it, it’s full of tacks. You know, I thought Flair spent years busting on Foley for relying on all the blood and hardcore stuff. That’s all Flair does anymore. Flair tries to go after Foley again, but Foley fights back and backdrops Flair onto the thumbtacks. It really starts to get uncomfortable watching Flair do this kind of stuff. But wait, it gets better: Foley goes under the ring and pulls out a barbed wire board, sliding it in the ring and then going after Flair in the corner. Foley with rapid fire rights in the corner and then grabs the barbed wire board and holds it in front of him as he charges at Flair in the corner. He tells the referee to start the count, but Flair makes it to his feet. Flair and Foley go toe to toe with Foley coming out on top, and then Foley goes under the ring AGAIN, and this time gets just a plain old table, but I guarantee that it won’t lead to anything good. Foley sets up the table and then goes after Flair, but Flair with a pair of groin uppercuts and then he lays Foley on the table. Flair grabs the barbed wire board and hits Foley with it like a chair, then goes up to the top rope and splashes Foley through the table. This is so surreal to watch. Both men are down and the referee starts counting as the crowd chants TNA, and Flair makes it up, then does the Flair Flop face first into the tacks as Foley makes it to his feet, and the ref counts 10 and awards the win to Foley.
Winner: Mick Foley
This was just brutal on so many levels, but absolutely blew away the matches they had a few years ago in WWE. Foley grabs the mic as Flair starts to head to the back and reminds him of the stipulation that Flair has to kiss Foley’s ass. Foley would have been content to shake Flair’s hand because he is a great man, but a deal is a deal, and he wants Flair to come back and kiss his ass. Flair has an understandable lack of enthusiasm, but slowly makes his way back into the ring as Foley tells him the fighting is over, but the kissing has just begun. Suddenly, Fortune runs out of the crowd and jump Foley 7-on-1 but EV2.0 runs out of the back and chases Fortune off. Flair gets a mic and says that’s kissing your ass, and on Sunday, they’re going to kiss all their asses and then calls them EV 2 My Ass.
We go to Mike and Taz as they talk about the physicality of the match we just saw, and wonders what we’re going to see when EV2.0 faces Fortune in Lethal Lockdown. Still to come: the $100,000 Gauntlet Battle Royal!
Eric Bischoff is backstage, and he’s…WALKING! And he’s coming out right now, walking past EV2.0 as they head to the back. We see a replay of what happened earlier as Abyss kidnapped Dixie, and then we go to Bischoff in the ring which is still littered with the remnants of the match we just saw. In a nice subtle touch, he looks down at the thumbtacks and broken table and shakes his head before grabbing a mic. He says he’s seen wrecks, but this is one hell of a trainwreck right here. He goes to speak to a stagehand and then comes back and says they don’t have much time here, so he wants Abyss to come out to the ring right now because they have something to talk about.
We go to commercial and when we come back Bischoff says he’s waited long enough and tells Abyss to come out now, but instead, Rob Van Dam’s music hits and he comes out…in his wrestling gear. Van Dam holds his back as he gets in the ring and tells Bischoff that there’s no way he’s going to be screwed out of the opportunity to fight Abyss on Sunday, and he’ll leave over this if Abyss is fired. RVD says they have a code backstage where they solve their own problems and don’t get management involved. RVD tells Eric to go to Dixie and tell her that either Abyss wrestles through Sunday, or she loses the Whole F’n Show. RVD drops the mic and walks off, and Bischoff picks it up and tells RVD that if that’s what he wants, then he’s got it.
We go to a video from last week in Philly as Tommy Dreamer and Rhino walk up to the ECW Arena, where they are mobbed by the fans as they walk down Swanson.
Still to come tonight: the $100,000 Battle Royal, and we’re back at commercial!
We come back to a video of earlier today as Orlando Jordan teaches Eric Young how to hold balls…so he can throw them at stacked milk bottles and win a stuffed animal. Young says it’s only a matter of time until PWI recognizes them (????), and then Jordan says he’s going to grab his balls and gives him a big hug. Speaking of Orlando and Eric…
Ink Inc vs Orlando Jordan & Eric Young
I guess with London Brawling disappearing, they needed SOMEBODY to fill the void, and I didn’t even mean that as a dirty joke. Eric is covered with drawn on tattoos, and he tries to lock up with his own partner to start the match, then high fives Shannon Moore and heads out to the apron. Orlando with a knee to the gut of Neal and tries for a hiptoss, but Neal blocks and hits a hiptoss of his own and then a dropkick. Taz says Orlando is flaming like a pack of hemmorhoids as Jordan grinds up on Neal and then suckerpunches him. Jordan with a snapmare and some stomps, then picks Neal up and delivers a shoulderbreaker before going to a wristlock and stomping on the shoulder of Neal. Neal fights his way out but walks right into a spinebuster, and then Jordan covers Neal with his crotch on Neal’s face for 2. Young comes in and runs around before heading back out to the apron, then Neal tags out to Moore, who comes in and cleans house on Jordan with clotheslines and a flying headscissores. Moore ducks a clothesline and gets a moonsault for 2. Young comes in and calls a double team move on Jordan, helping Moore hit a clothesline and then ratting Jordan out when Jordan tries to cover Moore with his feet on the ropes. Jordan lowblows Moore and covers him for the win, but Young tackles the referee and then takes a mic and says that, as the leader of this tag team, and as a member of the Worldwide Tag Team Coalition, they would like to forfeit this match. Young then offers to pull some strings and make some calls and set up a rematch at Bound For Glory.
Winners: Ink Inc by forfeit (I guess?)
We go to Jay Lethal’s parents’ house in Elizabeth, NJ where Jay shows where he first learned to do moonsaults and his grandfather would yell at him. He shows off his driveway and says that one of the reasons he moved to Florida was because he and his brothers would have to shovel it. He then shows his tree where he used to hide, and then shows us the street in New Jersey where he’s from and he grew up.
We go backstage to Dixie Carter and Rob Van Dam, and Dixie says that she understands their code, but as soon as Bound For Glory is over, Abyss is gone. Bischoff brings over a contract to terminate Abyss as of 12:01am on 10/11/10 that Dixie signs, and then she tells RVD that win, lose, or draw, she wants RVD to take Abyss out at Bound For Glory.
We’re back in the Impact Zone and hey, it’s the Shore: Robbie E and Cookie. I almost forgot they were going to be here. Okay, I totally forgot. Robbie says that he and Cookie are finally in TNA, and Cookie says the party’s here! Robbie says before he fist pumps the entire roster (?????), he and Cookie want to let all the Orlando, Florida hamsters know that there is zero hot girls in Florida. When he looks around, all he sees are a bunch of grenades. Cookie pulls his head down and tells him to watch out: INCOMING! Robbie tells her to watch his hair, and then Cookie says that her needs aren’t being fulfilled because she hasn’t seen one filthy gorilla since she’s been in town and doesn’t think the crowd leaves their houses because they don’t have tans. Robbie reminds her that these people live in their basements with their mothers and that’s why they don’t have tans. They inform us that next week on TNA, the party’s in the house…BITCHES!
We go to a video hyping Bound For Glory as several of the main event wrestlers give their take on the importance of the event to TNA.
$100,000 Bound For Glory Invitational Gauntlet Battle Royal
Ken Anderson draws #1, and #2 is Kurt Angle. They circle one another before tying up, and Anderson backs Angle to the corner, but breaks clean. Another tieup and Angle goes to a headlock, Anderson sends him to the ropes but Angle comes back and takes Anderson down with a shoulderblock as Jeff Hardy enters at #3. All three participants in this weekend’s title match circle one another as #4 comes in already, and it’s AJ Styles as we go to a commercial break. Great timing on those tonight, by the way.
Okay, we’re back from commercial and several other guys are in the ring, they seem to be joined by Douglas Williams, Sabu, Max Buck, Chris Sabin, and now Tommy Dreamer enters as we come back. Jay Lethal comes in next and goes after AJ as Tommy tries to dump Anderson. Lethal with a flying headscissors on AJ as Max goes to the apron and fights to stay alive. JEff Jarrett comes out now and tries to dump Williams, but he lands on the apron so Jarrett goes after AJ instead and tries to dump him, but AJ scissors Jarrett’s head and slips back in. Jarrett now tries to dump Anderson but Anderson’s not going, and Pope is in next and goes right after Jarrett, he tries to dump him but Jarrett holds the ropes and pulls himself back in. Across the ring, Sabin tries to eliminate Hardy but Hardy hangs on. Robert Roode comes in and goes after Lethal as Pope beats down Williams in the corner. Jarrett dumps Angle to the apron and tries to kick him to the floor as Angle holds the ropes. Now Sting comes in as Lethal puts Max Buck to the apron, and Sting takes turns beating up Jarrett and Dreamer. Hey, the main event seems like a good time to take TWO commercial breaks, so let’s take the second one now!
All right, we’re back and a bunch more people are in there as Abyss makes his way to the ring as we have 19 men in and nobody’s eliminated yet: until Abyss comes in and dumps Douglas Williams, Sabu, Jay Lethal, Stevie Richards, Chris Sabin, Raven all by himself. All the other people left in the ring decide to gang up on Abyss, Sting hits a Stinger Splash on top of the pile of people trying to toss Abyss, they all fall off so he tries another Stinger Splash but Abyss catches and tosses him as Nash comes out to join the fray. He goes right after Abyss and unloads a series of powerful kneelifts and then tries to toss him. Matt Morgan comes out now and lays out Generation Me, then drops Abyss with a big clothesline. He goes eye to eye with Kevin Nash and then go toe to toe with Morgan coming out on top as Samoa Joe makes his way out, but instead of going after Nash, he does after Tommy Dreamer, so Abyss tosses Nash and Morgan by himself instead. Dreamer goes after Abyss now and clotheslines him to the apron, but Abyss hangs on as James Storm makes his way out. Generation Me try to eliminate Abyss, but he goozles both of them and yanks them over the top to eliminate them, then gets back in the ring. Alex Shelley is out now as a bunch of guys try to unite against Abyss, but Abyss survives again. Anderson tries to toss AJ as Frankie Kazarian is eliminated and Rhino comes in and goes after Abyss. Dreamer tries to toss AJ, but AJ slips back in and goes after Dreamer, elevating him over the top but fails to eliminate him as Rhino is somehow eliminated off camera. Jarrett goes for the Stroke on Pope, but Abyss grabs Jarrett by the hair and tosses him. Now Pope tries Abyss but gets eliminated and then Shelley goes for Sliced Bread #2 and…you guessed it, Abyss picks him up and tosses him. Now Joe takes a shot at Abyss, working him over in the corner and hitting a running knee. Joe takes a run at him again and Abyss ducks down and Joe goes over the top and out of the match. Beer Money beat up Dreamer in the corner and hit a double suplex on him and then hit a double suplex on Abyss, then do their Beer…MONEY! thing.
Suddenly Roode grabs Storm and tries to toss him, but Storm hangs on and gets back in and they look like they’re about to fight…but then hug and make up just in time for Abyss to come over and eliminate both of them as well. AJ goes after Dreamer and Abyss tries to grab him from behind, but AJ shocks him with a Pelle Kick, and Dreamer tries to go after AJ but AByss grabs him and tosses him out, then presses AJ above his head and tosses him out as well. So we’re down to Abyss, Angle, Hardy and Anderson. Angle tries to German Suplex Hardy, but Hardy blocks and hits the Twist Of Fate, then nails the Swanton. Hardy tries to eliminate Angle but Abyss comes from behind and eliminates Hardy. Anderson goes after Abyss, but Abyss goozles him and delivers a chokeslam. Suddenly, Rob Van Dam’s music hits about ten minutes after the last entrant, and he comes in and goes right after Abyss, coming off the top with a jump kick and then hits a big crossbody, but overshoots Abyss and eliminates himself, landing with an audible splat. Luckily, Abyss sells it anyway even though RVD barely grazed him, and they’re both eliminated. It’s Angle and Anderson and they go toe to toe in the middle of the ring, Angle sends Anderson to the ropes but Anderson runs him over with a shoulderblock. Anderson off the ropes again and Anderson tries a fireman’s carry, Angle slips out, Anderson goes for the Mic Check, Angle slips out, Anderson gets a headlock and Angle give him an Angle Slam over the top rope to pick up the win and $100,000 in COLD HARD CASH!
Winner: Kurt Angle