ECW on SyFy Report – December 22, 2009
We start off with a look at the previous ECW Homecoming matches. Tonight, Jack Swagger smiles his way back into ECW and he will face Yoshi Tatsu. We are live on tape from Orlando, Florida and your announcers are Josh ‘Why can’t I go to Universal Studios’ Mathews and Byron ‘Happy Homecoming’ Saxton. Jack Swagger comes out and he has thomthing to thay. Swagger says that this show is finally worth watching again. Jack says that it is great to come back to where he started to be a part of the ECW Homecoming. He says that things have changed since he left with some new faces. However, some things have stayed the same. Christian is still a chump. Tommy Dreamer is still fat. Swagger shows us a video package. Swagger says that he will become the ECW Champion again. Zack Ryder comes out with Rosa Mendes for his match and walks past Swagger. We see Zack talking to Dreamer two weeks ago when he said that he wanted to finish Dreamer’s career. Match Number One: Zack ‘Morris’ Ryder and Rosa ‘Tori’ Mendes versus Tommy Dreamer They lock up and Dreamer with a side head lock and shoulder tackle. Dreamer blocks a hip toss and hits one of his own followed by an arm drag into an arm bar. Dreamer clotheslines Ryder over the top rope to the floor and Rosa distracts Dreamer on the apron and Ryder pulls Dreamer to the floor from the apron. They return to the ring and Ryder gets a near fall and then he punches Dreamer before he puts Dreamer in a reverse chin lock. Dreamer with a near fall but Ryder hits the leg lariat and gets a near fall of his own. Ryder sends Dreamer into the turnbuckles and he kicks Dreamer in the face. Ryder goes up top and Dreamer punches Ryder and Dreamer hits a superplex. Dreamer punches Ryder and then hits a back body drop and a clothesline followed by a slam. Dreamer gets a near fall. Dreamer with an Irish whip but Dreamer runs into a boot. Dreamer catches Ryder coming off the turnbuckles and he catapults Ryder into the ring post. Dreamer puts Ryder in the Tree of Woe and hits the E-C-fn-W drop kick. Dreamer takes off his shirt and Ryder goes to the apron and drops Dreamer against the ropes and Ryder hits the Zack Attack for the three count. Winner: Zack Ryder We go to commercial. We are back and did you know that a lot of people watch WWE in the United States. It is the time of the night that you want to be both blind, deaf, and dumb because Tony Atlas is here to introduce Abraham Washington for the Abraham Washington Show. Abe thanks everyone for the warm welcome. He says that it is good to be in Orlando and he says that he is not going to make any Tiger Woods jokes. He supports Tiger and says that Tiger used to call him before his wife took his phone. Abe brings out his guests, Caylen Croft and Trent Barreta. Abe did not like Caylen and Trent jumping on his couch. Trent says that they are taking things to the next level and he makes a video game console comparison. Caylen says that they have been best friends since Little League and he says that their moms are their biggest fans. Croft says that they want to come back next year to the ECW Homecoming as the Tag Champions. Tony says that he was a tag champion with Rocky Johnson and then Croft and Barreta yell at Tony. Abe defends Tony and then he tells him to shut up before ending the show. Tiffany is in her office and Jack Swagger enters and wants to know how she is still in charge. Tiffany says that it has been easier and better with Jack on Raw. Jack says that she brought him back to win the Homecoming and win the ECW Title at Royal Rumble. Hurricane hurri-enters the office. Swagger wants to know what Hurricane’s powers are. He says that he can do anything . . . except fix Swagger’s speech impediment. Hurricane hurri-leaves and so does Swagger. We go to commercial. We are back with a recap of John Cena’s comments from the Tribute to the Troops special. Match Number Two: Vance Archer versus Goldust in an ECW Homecoming Qualifying Match They lock up and Archer backs Goldust into the turnbuckles but he misses a punch. Goldust doesn’t. Archer with a punch but Goldust with a leaping butt bump. Archer with a hard Irish whip for a near fall. Archer with a slam and a rear chin lock. Archer with a forearm to the kidneys followed by a leg lariat for a near fall. Archer with a forearm and kick to the back. Archer with a rear chin lock. Goldust with punches but Archer with a forearm to the back. Goldust with a clothesline followed by the drop down uppercut and a bulldog for a near fall. Archer runs Goldust into the turnbuckles and then Archer hits the inverted DDT for the three count. Winner: Vance Archer We see Christian in the locker room watching on the mobile monitor. We go to commercial. We are back with a Smackdown Rebound because you cannot escape Matt Striker’s voice. Josh and Byron remind us that Undertaker will be facing Rey Mysterio for the World Title. It is time to take a look back at the end between Ezekiel Jackson and Vladimir Kozlov. Byron and Josh wonder when Regal became Jackson’s confidant. Jackson and Kozlov will meet again on Thursday night. Christian is giving Yoshi Tatsu some advice while Yoshi does some aerobics. Swagger enters and he makes a Karate Kid reference. Christian calls Swagger a dork and Yoshi says something in Japanese. Swagger says that he will beat Yoshi tonight and then he will beat Christian at the Royal Rumble. Yoshi calls Swagger a jackass and we go to commercial. We are back and did you know that Ted DiBiase is the new John Cena in Marine 2: That is not Behind Enemy Lines Colombia with Ted DiBiase superimposed over Ken Kennedy. We are told that Matt Hardy and Evan Bourne will return to ECW next week to compete in ECW Homecoming Matches. Match Number Three: Jack Swagger with Mike Epsenhart’s favorite entrance versus Yoshi Tatsu in an ECW Homecoming Qualifying Match Yoshi jumps around before they lock up and then they lock up and Swagger with a front face lock into a waist lock. Swagger with a waist lock take down. Yoshi gets to his feet and Swagger with another waist lock take down. Swagger with crossfaces to Yoshi followed by a forearm to the back. Yoshi with a kick and a rollup for a near fall. Yoshi with a drop kick and a near fall. Swagger with punches while Yoshi responds with forearms. Swagger runs Yoshi into the turnbuckles and then he hits a few shoulders. Swagger with an Irish whip and a running clothesline into the corner. Swagger with a key lock and an arm drag into an arm bar. Swagger tries for the Doctor Bomb but Yoshi escapes and he tries for a kick but Swagger moves out of the way and backs into the corner. We go to commercial. We are back and Swagger with a hammer lock on Yoshi. We see footage from the commercial when Swagger hit a wheelbarrow suplex. We return to live on tape action and Swagger with a forearm to the back. Swagger with an Irish whip but he runs into boots from Yoshi. Swagger sends Yoshi into the ropes and drives him to the mat. Swagger gets a near fall. Swagger with a belly-to-back suplex for a near fall. Swagger with a belly-to-belly suplex and then he forgets that he can pin Yoshi and he does push ups instead. Swagger with a series of elbow drops followed by a leaping leg drop for a near fall. Swagger with a key lock. Swagger with a forearm to the kidneys. Yoshi with a kick to the leg but Swagger with a forearm to the head and a kick to the torso. Swagger with an Irish whip but he misses a charge. Yoshi with kicks to Swagger followed by a back kick and drop kicks. Yoshi with a bulldog out of a wheelbarrow and he gets a near fall. Yoshi with the rolling snap mare but he misses the kick. Swagger tries for a rollup but Yoshi drops down and gets a near fall. Swagger misses another charge into the corner and then he sends Yoshi to the apron. Yoshi goes up top but Swagger leaps to the turnbuckles but Yoshi with an elbow. Yoshi with a kick from the turnbuckles for a near fall. Yoshi goes into the ropes and Swagger with a rollup for a near fall. Swagger waits for Yoshi to get up and he hits a clothesline for a near fall. Swagger tries for the Oklahoma Stampede and he hits it but he does not go for the cover. Swagger sets for the double jump Vader splash and he gets a two count. Yoshi with a kick to the head for the three count. Winner: Yoshi Tatsu We go to credits.