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TNA iMPACT Report – 8/27/2009

Posted by Marc Middleton in iMPACT! Results
Friday, August 28th, 2009

TNA iMPACT Report – August 27th, 2009
Report by PWInsider, Richard Trionfo

We start off tonight with a look at the problems between and . We are going to have women’s tag titles. Bobby Lashley will be with tonight.

We see A.J. Styles and arrive. Lauren asks A.J. about his retirement situation. A.J. points out that he has his gear and he is ready to work. says that he smells success. Kip James comes out and he asks to park ’s car and says that he doesn’t have to park anyone’s car. Kip says that he had that same car when he was over.

We are live on tape from Universal Studios in Orlando, Florida and your announcers are Mike ‘ probably couldn’t ride the new roller coaster’ Tenay and .

Daniels is with Mike and Taz to watch the first match.

Match Number One: versus in a Non Title Match

Joe with a kick to Suicide followed by punches. Joe with an Irish whip followed by a shoulder and pele kick. Suicide punches Joe and then he floats over on a charge by Joe. Suicide with a drop kick that sends Joe into the turnbuckles. Suicide with a kick and then he runs Joe into the turnbuckles. Suicide with a drop kick for a near fall.

D’Angelo Dinero comes out and that distracts Suicide and Joe kicks Suicide to the floor. Dinero attacks Suicide and then Joe and Daniels join in and the match is thrown out.

Thanks to the referee’s decision, we have a tag match involving these four men.

Lauren is with and she asks Eric if Hernandez would join the World Elite. Eric says that Hernandez becomes a part of the World Elite tonight. Eric says that Hernandez is just like him, a second class citizen and an outcast. Eric says that he opens his eyes tonight. We go to commercial.

We are back and did you know that TNA can do the same thing WWE does, but they hype their British ratings.

The World Elite are in the ring and Eric Young says that Bashir wants to talk to the American public. Bashir has something serious to say. He throws his headdress to the floor to avoid any preconceived notions they have about him so they can listen to him. He wants to talk about the war in Iraq. Bashir remembers when George Bush said that the war was over with the ‘Mission Accomplished’ banner. He talks about people dying. He calls the people brainwashed. He says the truth is that ‘you people’ don’t want their land or democracy. ‘You people’ don’t want to stop terrorism. He calls Americans junkies and addicts for our oil.

Eric thanks Bashir for enlightening everyone. He says that this is not the only reason he came out tonight. He talks about a man who is handcuffed by his corrupt morals. He wants to talk about Hernandez.

Speak of the devil, Hernandez’s music plays and he comes to the ring.

Hernandez says that if Eric has something to say, he should say it to his face. Eric says that he wouldn’t have it any other way and he calls Hernandez ‘brother’. He asks Hernandez how many times he came to the ring in the colors of Mexico. Eric says that the people will never respect him. He says that they will only view him as a street thug and thief. He tells Hernandez to come home to be elite and join the World Elite. Hernandez says that he is home. He tells them if they don’t love this country, they can leave.

Lauren is with Sharmell and Traci and she points out that they will face Kong and Raisha Saeed. Sharmell says that they are not sweating Kong and Saeed. Sharmell says that she is not afraid of them. Traci points out that Sharmell is the first lady of the Main Event Mafia and Traci says that she is the chosen one. They will not only beat them, they will roll over their fat asses.

Kong and Saeed walk in the back and we go to commercial.

We are back and Lauren is being asked to move her mic so the can get a better shot at Lauren’s cleavage. is looking at her chest as well. Chris says that the camera man is doing his best. Dr. Stevie asks Sabin if he is ready to make some money. He tells Chris and Alex that they can make some good money if they end Abyss’s career. We see the new Motor City Machine Guns tissue holder.

Match Number Two: Raisha Saeed and Awesome Kong versus and Sharmell in a Women’s Tag Title Tournament Match

Kong goes after Traci but Traci avoids her and Traci tags in Sharmell and then Traci calls a time out. Traci and Sharmell talk some strategy. Saeed tags in and Sharmell pushes Saeed but Saeed pushes back. Traci tags in and Saeed with a chop and Irish whip followed by a splash in the corner. Saeed with a slam and snap elbow drop for a near fall. Saeed with a snap suplex. Sharmell grabs Saeed but Saeed takes care of Sharmell. Traci gets a near fall. Traci chokes Saeed in the ropes and then connects with knees to the back. Saeed kicks Traci away and Kong is tagged in. Kong with a clothesline or two. Kong with a splash into the corner and then she tries for the Implant Buster but Traci escapes but she runs into Kong. Kong with a splash from the second turnbuckle and Sharmell breaks up the cover but then she runs for the hills. Saeed tags in and gets the three count.
Winners: Awesome Kong and Raisha Saeed

We have a Matt Morgan video package.

Matt Morgan is in the back with Jeremy Borash and he enters the Main Event Mafia dressing room. Kurt tells everyone to calm down. Matt asks Kurt about screwing up last week and going through a table. Angle and Morgan talk about how long they have been in the business and Angle says that Morgan is inexperienced. Angle says that he is going to give Matt more experience by teaming with Booker and Steiner. Matt asks Kurt if Dixie approved the match. Matt says that when Kurt is chilling with Dixie in Nashville, Kurt will be defending his title in a four way match. Matt says that he is going to be in the match at . Matt says that he will have Kurt’s back like Kurt had his back at and last week. Matt wants a hug and gets it.

We go to commercial.

We are back and Homicide was mentioned in The Source magazine.

We have a Jesse Neal video package.

Match Number Three: Jesse Neal versus

Rhino offers his hand but it is a trap and he kicks and punches Jesse. Rhino sends Jesse into the turnbuckles and he kicks Jesse. Rhino raises his arms because he can and then he chokes Jesse with his boot and the ropes. Rhino with a punch to the head and then he chokes Jesse. Jesse with a punch or two but Rhino with kicks to Jesse. Rhino with a boot and a kick to the head for a two count. Rhino with a spinebuster for the three count.
Winner: Rhino

After the match, while Jesse gets to his feet, Rhino hits a Gore. The referee has reversed the decision. Rhino continues the attack and Devon comes to the ring. Devon stands over Jesse and Rhino leaves the ring.

Jeremy Borash is in Mick’s office with Cody Deaner and ODB. Mick has a British barrister’s wig and court is in session. Abyss interrupts and he gives Mick his barbed wire bat back. Mick has a present for Abyss and it is groceries. Mick tells Abyss to hit Cody with the bat, but he is kidding. Mick wishes Abyss luck in his match and he tells Abyss to take it easy on Shelley. ODB pleads her case for being the women’s title. Cody has some demonstrative evidence to support his position as women’s champion. Mick says that the title has been held up until No Surrender when Cody and ODB will meet for the title.

Mick talks about getting and says that time will tell what that is.

Abyss is walking and clapping as we go to commercial.

Match Number Four: Motor City Machine Guns with Dr. Stevie versus Abyss in the Dr. Stevie $50,000 End Abyss’ Career Bounty Match

Sabin grabs Abyss’ leg and Shelley attacks. They connect with some tandem kicks and then they pose. Shelley and Sabin with elbows and they try for a double suplex but Abyss with a double suplex of his own. Abyss with a side slam to Shelley and then he choke slams Sabin onto Shelley. Abyss claps and then he hits a splash into the corner on Sabin. He misses one on Shelley and then they connect with a tandem kick. Sabin with a drop kick as he comes off Shelley’s back and Abyss goes to the floor. Shelley with a pescado but Abyss catches him. Sabin with a suicide dive and that takes Abyss down. Shelley goes up top for a cross body and Abyss catches him again. Sabin with a missile drop kick for a near fall. Sabin and Shelley wait for Abyss to get to his feet and then hit a double super kick. Abyss gets Shelley up and Sabin gets a kick for his troubles. Abyss hits Shock Treatment and adds a leg drop. Dr. Stevie interferes but Abyss sees Sabin on the apron and he lets go of Stevie to catch Sabin and hit a Black Hole Slam for the three count.
Winner: Abyss

After the match, Stevie yells at Sabin and Shelley and Shelley puts Stevie in the tree of woe and Sabin with the hesitation drop kick. Abyss returns to the ring with a chair but ’s music plays. He comes out and we go to commercial.

We are back and Nash asks Stevie if he has $50,000 and that works for him. Nash says that he has a couple of problems. Abyss stuck his nose in Nash’s match at Hard Justice. Nash says that he will take Richards’ monster and give him Abyss’ head for the money. He tells Abyss that he made it personal.

Lauren is with Daffney and she asks about her match with Hamada. Daffney says that she is nuts and she lives minute by minute. She relies on violence because it is always there. Daffney asks Lauren if she ever counted sheep. Daffney says that she does and she does not let them get over the fence. Daffney says that Hamada will see how crazy she is.

Match Number Five: Daffney versus Hamada in a No Disqualification Match

Daffney with forearms and then she tosses Hamada by the hair and then hits a neck breaker. Daffney with a kick for a near fall. Hamada and Daffney exchange chops but Daffney with a European uppercut. Hamada with a kick and then she kicks Daffney in the corner. Daffney with a kick but Hamada sends Daffney to the apron and then Hamada kicks Daffney off the apron to the floor. We go to commercial.

We are back and Daffney with an Irish whip and a running forearm into the corner. Daffney with an elbow from the turnbuckles for a near fall. Hamada with a kick to Daffney followed by an enzuigiri. Hamada with a chop and clothesline. Hamada with a head butt or two and Daffney goes down. Hamada with a DDT for a two count. Hamada misses a spin kick and Daffney with a kick and a Shining Wizard for a two count. Daffney sends Hamada to the floor and Daffney goes out after her and works on the back. We see the table that was set up during the commercial break. Daffney gets a chair but Hamada moves out of the way. Hamada puts the chair around Daffney’s neck and sends Daffney into the post. Hamada puts Daffney on the table and then Hamada goes to the apron and she hits a moonsault through the table. They return to the ring and Hamada with a Hamada Driver for the three count.
Winner: Hamada

Angelina Love and are walking in the back looking for Madison as we go to commercial.

We are back and Angelina and Velvet are walking and Jeremy is trying to stop them. They find Madison in the dressing room and Angelina is still not happy that Madison cost her the title. Angelina mentions Madison’s mystery partner and Angelina talks about the coincidence that they will be meeting in the first round of the tournament. Madison tells Angelina to do something about it. Madison pushes Angelina away and then they double team Madison until Borash is able to shield Madison from the attack.

Match Number One Restarted: D’Angelo Dinero and Samoa Joe versus Daniels and Suicide

Suicide and Joe start things off and Joe with an shoulder throw and Dinero tags in. Suicide with an arm drag and drop kick and Daniels is tagged in. Daniels sends Suicide into Dinero and then Daniels with a leg lariat off Suicide’s back. Suicide with a slam and an Arabian press for a near fall. Daniels with jabs to Dinero and Joe with a knee to the back and Dinero with an STO as we go to commercial.

We are back and Joe with punches to Daniels but Daniels with an enzuigiri followed by a kick and STO. Dinero and Suicide tag in and Suicide with a springboard back elbow and clothesline. Suicide with a corkscrew side Russian leg sweep for a near fall that Joe gets involved in breaking up. Suicide with a fireman’s carry slam and Joe gets into the ring. All four men are involved. Joe with a clothesline for Suicide and Dinero with a German suplex to Daniels. Daniels gets into the ring before Joe hits his suicide dive. Daniels with an Arabian press. Suicide misses a springboard cross body but he moves when Dinero tries for the running knees into the back. Suicide with a rollup for a near fall.
Winners: Daniels and Suicide

We go to commercial.

We are back and Jeremy Borash is with Dixie Carter and Bobby Lashley. Jeremy points out that it is Dixie’s first time on camera. Dixie announces the new three year deal with SpikeTV and says that there will be some specials coming in the future. Jeremy asks Bobby about walking away from wrestling and coming back. Bobby says that he still has the passion for professional wrestling and he talks about the meetings that he had with Dixie to figure out a way that he can do both MMA and wrestling. Dixie talks about how this signing makes a mark in the business. Bobby says that his goal in TNA is to make an impact. He wants to face Kurt Angle and he is aiming for the top. Dixie says that she would like to see Bobby be the champion in both wrestling and MMA. Bobby will be wrestling at No Surrender against Rhino.

Kurt Angle comes to the ring and he joins Mike and Taz at the announce table.

Match Number Six: A.J. Styles, Sting, and Hernandez versus , , and Matt Morgan

Sting and Booker start things off and Booker has some words for Morgan. Booker does some Tai Chi before locking up and Booker with punches to Sting in the corner. Sting with punches followed by a reverse atomic drop and drop kick. Sting with a hip toss and then Styles tags in. Booker backs Styles into his corner and Steiner tags in. Steiner chokes A.J. in the ropes. Steiner with a kick after Styles hits the ropes awkwardly. Styles hits a phenomenal drop kick followed by a phenomenal knee drop. Hernandez tags in and he connects with a forearm but Morgan tags in. Morgan shows Hernandez that he is taller and Hernandez tries for a few shoulder tackles but Morgan stays up. Morgan with a clothesline. Hernandez with a knee and delayed vertical suplex. We see Morgan, Steiner, and Booker argue on the floor and Hernandez hits the plancha onto all three men. We go to commercial.

We are back and Steiner with a reverse chin lock on Styles. Styles with elbows and a punch. Steiner with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex for a near fall. Morgan tags in and he kicks Styles in the head. Morgan with a head butt to Styles. Styles tags in Hernandez and Hernandez with the slingshot shoulder followed by forearms and a spinebuster to Booker. Morgan with a punch to Hernandez followed by an Irish whip. Hernandez takes Morgan down and gets a near fall. All six men are in the ring but Styles and Steiner go to the floor. Hernandez and Morgan are all that remains in the ring and Hernandez misses a Stinger splash. Morgan sets for the Hellevator and Steiner has a chair. Hernandez sends Morgan into the chair and Styles with a springboard cross body for the three count.
Winners: Sting, Hernandez, and A.J. Styles

We go to credits with Kurt Angle blaming Matt Morgan for the loss and Steiner and Booker are yelling at Morgan. Morgan punches Steiner and Booker. Tenay confirms the four way match at No Surrender and Matt Morgan is one of the opponents.

RARE PIX OF ANGELINA LOVE AND VELVET SKY UNCENSORED…..

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