ECW on Sci-Fi Report for March 10th, 2009
Taped in Jacksonville, FL
Report by Richard Trionfo

We are live on tape from Jacksonville, Florida and your announcers are Matt ‘Not Quite Dennis Miller’ Striker and Todd ‘You mean they weren’t really in St. Louis last night’ Grisham.

We see footage from the Dirt Sheet where Miz and Morrison portray The Colons as rear ends.

Match Number One: The Miz with John Morrison versus Primo Colon with Carlito and the Bellas
John Morrison, Carlito, and the Bellas are at the announce table.

They lock up and Miz with a waist lock and Primo with a standing switch. Miz gets to the ropes and Primo breaks the hold. Miz with a side head lock and he holds on. Primo with a side head lock and shoulder tackle. Primo with a kick and leg sweep followed by a leg drop for a near fall. Primo with a drop kick that sends Miz into the turnbuckles. Primo with punches of cinco. Primo sends Miz into the turnbuckles again and gets a near fall. Primo with boots to Miz but Miz sends Primo off the apron and Primo lands hard. We go to commercial.

We are back and Miz with a rear chin lock. Primo with forearms and an Irish whip. Miz sends Primo to the apron and then Primo goes up top and hits a cross body for a near fall. Primo misses a cross body and goes to the floor. Miz goes to the floor and connects with a forearm to the head right in front of Carlito. Miz rolls Primo back into the ring and Miz with knees to the back. Miz with a kick to the chest and then he catapults Primo into the bottom rope and gets a near fall. Miz tries to work on Primo’s back as he stretches him and puts the knee in the back. Primo with a kick and punches. Miz runs Primo into the corner and he works on the lower back. Primo with an electric chair drop and both men are down. Miz and Primo exchange left hands and Primo with a flying back elbow and clothesline followed by a drop kick. Primo with a springboard drop kick for a two count.

Miz with a modified Stroke that lands Primo on top of his head. Primo with a rollup and Miz rolls through for a near fall. Miz runs into an elbow and then Primo comes off the turnbuckles but Miz turns it into a power slam for a near fall. Miz sets for the running clothesline into the corner but Primo moves and then he hits a lungblower for the three count.
Winner: Primo

After the match, Primo and Carlito celebrate with the Bellas while Morrison checks on Miz in the ring.

It is time for ECW to take a look at 12 Rounds (or Orange Sash . . . The Early Years).

Great Khali and Runjin Singh are in the back talking about something as we go to commercial.

We are back and Male Teens love ECW as much as Germans love David Hasselhoff.

We have the Extreme Rewind: Natalya defeating Alicia Fox and DJ Gabriel attacking Tyson Kidd.

Match Number Two: Tyson Kidd with Natalya versus DJ Gabriel with Alicia Fox
Kidd with a knee and forearms but Gabriel with an uppercut and forearm followed by a back body drop. Kidd backs into the corner followed by an Irish whip but Kidd moves and hits a drop toe hold into the turnbuckles. They both go to the floor and Kidd with a kick to the head. They return to the ring and Kidd with a near fall. Kidd with a kick to the back and then he hits a kick to the chest for a near fall. Kidd with a leg drop and then he puts Gabriel in a rear chin lock. Gabriel with an arm drag but Kidd with a kick. Gabriel with a wheelbarrow suplex and a near fall. Kidd with elbows and then Gabriel tries for a suplex but Kidd is able to get to the apron and he drops Gabriel on the top rope and then Kidd gets the three count after a springboard elbow drop.
Winner: Tyson Kidd

We are back and Evan Bourne is one week away from his return.

It is time for a look back at the Triple H/Randy Orton Home Invasion Adventure.

Time to take a look back at the Wrestlemania where Jim Ross started, in Las Vegas.

Match Number Three: The Tri-Brand Battle Royale Money in the Bank Qualifying Match
The participants in this match are JTG, Shad Gaspard, Kung Fu Naki, Christian, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Chavo Guerrero, William Regal, R Truth, Tommy Dreamer, Goldust, Jimmy Wang Yang, Paul Burchill, Dolph Ziggler, Charlie Haas, and Ricky Ortiz.

There is pandemonium in the ring and Ricky Ortiz is eliminated by Khali. Kozlov with a head butt to Funaki and then he is eliminated. Khali pushes Kozlov over by the leg. Then everyone else eliminates Khali. Haas and Ziggler eliminate Yang. Ziggler drop kicks Goldust over the top rope. With Ziggler and Haas on the apron, Cryme Tyme eliminate each of them.

Things slow down a bit as Cryme Tyme work on Paul Burchill but he lands on the apron. Then Shad and JTG punch Burchill off. JTG eliminates his tag team partner as we go to commercial.

We are back and Christian, William Regal, Tommy Dreamer, R Truth, and Chavo Guerrero are left. We see a TNA-tastic tower of doom move. William Regal falls victim to a DDT from Tommy Dreamer. Dreamer picks up Regal and Regal is able to keep his feet off the floor. Regal pulls Dreamer over the top rope to eliminate him. R Truth and Christian battle in the center of the ring and Truth with a clothesline. Christian tries to eliminate R Truth and he avoids him but Truth misses a side kick. Chavo throws Truth over the top rope and he is eliminated. Chavo goes after Christian but Christian holds on and kicks Chavo away. Christian punches Chavo and tries for an Unprettier but Regal with a forearm. Regal with a head and arm suplex that sends Chavo into Christian. Regal throws Christian to the apron and then he charges at Christian and Christian eliminates Regal. Christian rolls back in from the apron and he kicks Chavo. Chavo with kicks and forearms to Christian. Chavo shimmies and sets for the Three Amigos and hits it. Chavo goes up top for the frog splash but Christian gets up. Christian tries for the Unprettier but Chavo escapes the hold. Chavo is sent to the apron and then Chavo tries to pulls Christian over like Big Show was eliminated in a past Royal Rumble. Chavo with forearms and Christian uses the ropes to kick Chavo to the floor to eliminate him.
Winner: Christian

We go to credits with Christian pointing to the sign.

RARE SET OF TIFFANY’S PLAYBOY PHOTOS….

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